Even Worse

     Just when I thought that I had my hands full dealing with this Cdiff, LJ got sick out of nowhere the other day.  My poor baby got a fever out of the clear blue sky, and now, on top of everything else, we have to try to find out what is going on here.  He dealt with it pretty good all weekend long, but earlier, I noticed he stopped having as many wet diapers as he usually does.  That is where the red flag goes up.  Anybody who has a child with kidney issues knows, when there is a change in wet diapers, it's time to get to the doctor, so tomorrow, we will be right at the hospital.  It's hard to tell though, because he has the diarrhea, but I put a urine bag on him about 30 minutes ago just to get some kind of an idea for when I bring him in tomorrow.
     It hurts my heart so bad when my baby is sick.  I mean, he deals with so much, and he is such a trooper.  He rarely ever complains about anything.  I am truly blessed when it comes to that.  He deals with frequent blood draws, and all the poking and prodding that goes on at the hospital.  LJ has to go through so much more than other children his age, and he does it all with a smile on his face.  When he gets sick with things that are normally not a big deal for other children, they are always a big deal for him.  I hate seeing my Angel in pain, or unable to do the few things that he normally does.  Its bad enough that he can't run around and play, enjoy most things that he wants to, but to see him totally unable to interact just tares me apart.  I would give anything to take away all of his pain, to make all of his ailments my own.  I feel so hopeless, so helpless when my baby looks at me and asks me what's wrong with him.  I tell him everybody gets sick sometimes, but he says he's always sick.  It hurts me so bad.  He's so smart... too smart.  I just want to make him better.  It seems like it's always something though, and I don't know why, so I don't even really know what to tell him.  What do I say to him?  I ask the same questions that he does.  I try to stay positive.  I pray constantly.  I don't know what to do anymore.  I'm not going to stop praying, but I would be lying if I said that I don't get scared.  All I can do is keep going.