Sighs of Relief

I got to breathe easy today after a night of serious prayer and many tears.  I was so worried about the testing that my baby had to go through this morning, and what the results would mean for us.  We didn't even expect to be getting such off the wall news about his bladder and this reflux that seemed to have come out of nowhere.  This was such an unpleasant surprise, it knocked my socks off to be honest.  I had spoke to one of the urologist last night, and she was telling me what to expect from the procedure and what the possible outcomes could be.  We talked about some worst case scenarios like surgery and catheterization at home.  The thing that really was scary to me was that she kept going back to the possibility of LJ needing to be catheterized at home.  I was scared to death thinking about having to do this to my little boy everyday.  I was dreading the the thought of him crying and begging me not to do it.  He loses his mind every time he needs to be catheterized for any reason, like testing, or to get a urine sample.  I was sick to my stomach, and I am still shivering even thinking about having to put him through that on a regular basis.  The testing that was done was the most extreme form of testing that they do.  LJ had a catheter in his bladder, and a probe in his rectum to measure the pressure of his bladder during filling and when he releases urine.   I was so relieved when the doctor came in this afternoon and told me that the head urologist was pleased with the results of the urodynamics study though.  My heart was literally in my mouth when she walked through the door.  They did recommend that we come back in about a month to repeat the test, and they started him on Ditropan, a medication to help relax his bladder.  They also want LJ to participate in something called Bio feedback, which I don't full understand, but it is something that will teach him how to work on tightening the muscles of his bladder, like through exercises.  It is suppose to be playful and taught through games and videos for children.  I was definitely happy to hear that.  All of these things are so much better than my baby having to uses a catheter a couple times a day.  If it was something that I needed to do, just as I had to perform his dialysis at home, and take care of his broviac when he had it, then I would do it, but for his sake, I would prefer that he have the least amount of painful or invasive things to endure.  I am so thankful that God truly answered my prayers on this one.  It's the thing that most people don't even think twice about that some of us pray for.  Thank you God!!!